“Have you ever tried to eat a clock? It’s very time consuming.”
“I would eat the salad too, but I decided that becoming a vegetarian was a huge missed steak.”
“My mom ran out of poultry seasoning, so she just winged it.”
“Why did the man bring an umbrella with him into the ice cream store? (I will be living in a box.) Because he heard there was a chance of sprinkles! Can someone pass the mashed potatoes?” (cue quarter-life crisis)
“People who eat their apples stem, seed and all improve their core values.”
“Seven days without pizza makes one weak, so do you want some cheese to go with your whine?”
(In dramatic voice with pretend microphone in hand) “A reporter was at an ice cream store getting the scoop.”
“I went to a buffet dinner with my neighbor, who is a taxidermist, and after such a big meal, I was stuffed.”
Don’t get caught in a pinch (of seasoning) this Thanksgiving. When your family’s close proximity creates a ticking time bomb, just bust out some of these corn(y) puns to save the holiday!
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