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I Wore Rosé Deodorant All Weekend and Here’s What Happened

Spoiler alert: not much, but it was pretty fun
wine
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As an egg enthusiast, avocado toast connoisseur, and frequent sipper of one too many mimosas, I couldn’t help but indulge when I came across brunch-scented natural deodorants. My pits have been sporting the same, dull Dove Cucumber scent too long, and the find made me realize I was in need of some serious sprucing.

The product seemed promising. I chose Native, a deodorant brand that stakes claim to the slogan, “Deodorant that isn’t a chemistry experiment.”

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It’s all natural, meaning the ingredients are free of aluminum, parabens, and harsh chemicals and are instead fluffed with shea butter, jojoba oil, and more natural substances. There were three scents that reeked of brunch booze — the best kind of booze, if you ask me. Rosé, sangria, and mimosa are the scents in Native’s limited-edition “Brunch Scents” collection. I got my hands on all three.

I was a bit skeptical — I’d heard natural deodorants don’t work. They get a particularly bad rap for their failure to remain effective through the turmoil of a sweat-prone lifestyle. And if anyone’s lifestyle is prone to perspiration, it’s mine.

I enjoy high intensity workouts daily, am training to return to work as a fitness instructor, and perspire my way through a truckload of anxiety in any number of stressful (or, you know, social) situations. So, really, I was the prime testing agent: A blank deodorant product review palette just waiting to be colored with a weekend of boozy brunch scents.

Here’s how my weekend went.

Day 1
The weekend began uneventfully. On Friday evening, I arrived home, Skyped with a friend from college, and declined an invitation to go out to the bars.

I had a resolve to stay in for the night; I’d hurt my knee while running Thursday morning, and knew I could use some rest. I sported the scent that appealed most to me — rosé — and sat down to an evening of much-needed self-care and sleep. It was surprisingly free of any booze stench, which helped me feel better about my dismal Friday night plans.

Day 2
Saturday morning, I woke up refreshed. My cousin was hosting an outdoor barbecue to commemorate the second anniversary of her co-owned pole-dancing studio in Brooklyn. I knew this overall-and-piercing-clad crowd was the perfect audience to test out the effect of my trending pits.

But before attending, I hit the gym. I reapplied for a second time — the first time being the night before — despite the fact I didn’t think I needed to. The smell had held up overnight. Then, I took a Tabata class — a high-intensity interval class involving plyometric and weight training.

It lasted through the workout. Incredible.

Afterwards, though, the sweet smell of rosé began to weaken. I showered and went on to: 1) attend the barbecue 2) laugh raucously through a comedy show and three martinis’ worth of pineapple vodka, and 3) play drinking games with some friends I’d met twice before. All without reapplying. And all without comment on my odor.

No one, through all these festivities, noticed at all.

I was disappointed. But then, I was thrilled: No one commented on my odor. The natural deodorant worked!

Day 3
This time, when I woke up I smelled like booze. But was it the deodorant?

Doubtful. I was nursing a mean hangover, but the sweet smell of my deodorant was oddly still pleasant. I decided to give another scent a go, and rolled on the sangria.

They smelled exactly the same.

Oh, well. I headed out the door to run errands and practice teaching a session at my fitness studio.

I was significantly disappointed that my weekend plans didn’t involve brunch. I would have liked to do a side-by-side sniff comparison between some actual brunch cocktails and the ones I’d smeared on my skin. But I can tell you from past experience alone that the smell was significantly different — but perhaps that’s a good thing.

So would I buy it?
The entire package is $30 at retail price online. Full disclosure, I did receive mine for free from Native to try out. I did not, however, promise them an article.

I’d buy this set again. The non-natural roll-on deodorants I’m used to using are not only far more potent than these (in a harsh, unenjoyable way) but they also leave behind a flaky residue of embarrassing white dust all over of my clothing. That’s the reason I switched to the spray-on stuff about a year ago, undoubtedly introducing a whole slew of carcinogens and ozone-polluting toxins into my apartment’s air.

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This sweet-smelling roll-on is my newfound solution. I’m going to keep wearing it, and hopefully it’ll hold up through sweaty brunches, cocktails, and summer nights galore