The Ultimate Edible Underwear Taste Test (Slideshow)
February 19, 2015
Are you actually supposed to eat this stuff?
No giggling. This is science.
7) Cotton Candy Briefs
No cotton candy flavor here whatsoever, just a mouthful of chemicals. "Tastes like a balloon filled with Robitussin," said one taster. Managed to be both flavorless and harshly off-putting.
6) Strawberry Champagne Thong
"Tastes of neither strawberry nor champagne," said one taster. "I think they just put a new label on a bad batch of strawberry."
5) Passion Fruit Thong
"Gross," wrote more than one taster. "Kill me," another. It tasted just like all the other red ones, but with a slightly different chemical note. Did a professional food scientist actually develop these things?
4) Passion Fruit Briefs
"I feel like the men’s taste better than the women’s," one taster noted.
3) Chocolate Thong
A slight change of pace from "chemical red" flavor, "chemical brown" maybe, just maybe, tasted a tiny bit like some sort of super-synthetic chocolate.
2) Cherry Briefs
Surprisingly, possibly because cherry is an artificial flavor that’s been just about perfected over the years, these actually tasted a bit like something containing artificial cherry flavoring as opposed to just "pink" flavoring. Still, gross.
1) Strawberry Chocolate Briefs
The fact that this contained two flavors, and thus the slightest amount of contrast, put it ahead of the others. One bite was still enough, though.
If you happen to find yourself in the market for edible underwear, this one and cherry are probably your best bet from a flavor standpoint, but honestly, if you’re really desperate to get food involved in the bedroom just use whipped cream, or chocolate syrup, or something. Hell, fashion your own pair out of Fruit Roll-Ups. At least it’s made out of food.