7 Whole Foods Bakery Cakes, Ranked Worst To Best

Who says you need a special occasion to indulge yourself in a delicious cake? If it's a day that ends in Y, that's a good enough reason as far as I'm concerned, and when I'm in the mood for cake, the Whole Foods Market bakery department is at the top of my list. While it's been criticized in recent years for cutting corners — like when customer backlash against the Whole Foods Berry Chantilly cake made the store abandon a new recipe — its cakes are still top-notch, especially when compared with most other grocery store bakery offerings. 

Whole Foods offers an incredibly wide variety of cakes in all sizes and flavors, some year-round and some seasonal, assembled by its in-house team of bakers and decorators. With such a staggering assortment of tempting goods, decision paralysis can be an understandable reaction, but thankfully the store offers many of its popular cakes in convenient single-slice form. I took on the task of tasting and ranking each one to find out which of these sweet treats is worthy of a celebration, or just a casual cake craving.

Whole Foods' brown butter cookie caramel crunch cake is a jumbled mouthful to say, and it's also a jumbled mouthful to swallow. As you can tell from the name, this cake has a lot going on, which is not necessarily a problem. Instead of harmonizing, however, the elements are muddled and chaotic. I can't really figure out what this cake is trying to be other than an overly sweet, overly rich sugar bomb. If that's your jam, and you have a high tolerance for excessively sweet desserts, you might love this. For me, it was by far the least enjoyable of Whole Foods' cakes.

The chocolate cake itself is moist, which is great, but it's also quite dense. The layers of rich buttercream frosting and filling contribute more density and intense sweetness, despite their relative thinness. On top of that there's a coating of caramel, and on top of that are crumbled brown butter cookies. Not one element of this cake has lightness, tang, or subtlety — it's all thick, intense, gooey, and sweet from top to bottom. No exaggeration, after having just a few bites of this cake I had to guzzle a pint of water and lie down. I should report that other members of my household liked this cake a lot, so your palate may disagree. For mine, it was a struggle.

The fact that Whole Foods' chocolate eruption cake is second-to-last in this ranking is not an admonishment upon it, but rather a testament to the exceptional cakes in the rest of the lineup. This is a solid, well-crafted, and tasty chocolate cake. Two layers of moist chocolate sponge sandwich a thick seam of airy, silky chocolate mousse, all topped with a blanket of rich chocolate buttercream and drizzles of ganache. There are certainly enough chocolate elements here to earn the name, and unlike the previous cake, they work together well as contrasting intensities, textures, and flavors.

Thanks to the mousse and the ganache, this is a slightly elevated, more sophisticated version of a classic chocolate layer cake that you might have at a kid's birthday party. Only slightly, though — there's nothing surprising or thrilling here. I did find the frosting to be a bit oily in texture, and found myself wishing they had just topped the cake with more mousse, which was the highlight. The chocolate eruption cake will certainly please the palates of any chocolate lover, and I would happily indulge in this again, though I'll reach for one of the next five cakes first.

I should note right oft the bat here that the sliced tiramisu and the full tiramisu cake from Whole Foods are two distinct recipes — the full size uses layers of vanilla cake as the base, while the sliced version here is more traditional with ladyfinger biscuits. I'd heard mixed things about both, so I wasn't sure what to expect, and as an unabashed lover of all edible things Italian, I think I have a pretty high bar when it comes to judging desserts like this. While this was not the most perfect slice of this Italian treat that I've ever had, it successfully ticked a lot of boxes from what I expect of classic tiramisu.

A good bite of tiramisu should be a tantalizing dance between sweet and bitter, and this slice offered the ideal amount of robust coffee character to set that in motion. The base of the container was like a lake of espresso, and the bottom layers were absolutely soaked through with it. Despite the saturation, the slice held together quite well, which was an impressive feat. Cocoa-dusted mascarpone, a rich and creamy fresh Italian cheese that lies on top of the rest, adds just the right sweet and silky contrast. This is definitely a coffee-lover's tiramisu — some of my fellow tasters found it too bitter, but I thought it achieved decent balance. Other issues, though, were that my slice was a bit of a mess visually, and didn't hold up for long outside the fridge.

There are plenty of unique variations on carrot cake, but the unfussy classic is hard to beat. The Whole Foods bakers seem to agree, as their version is about as traditional as it gets. All of the elements are here and are represented well: Moist cake, plenty of warm spice, crunchy walnuts, and a rich, tangy cream cheese frosting and filling. This cake is not going to blow anyone's mind, but that's not what it's trying to do. It's simply a solid, well-balanced version of a beloved classic recipe.

There's no shortage of carrot here, with visible bits of bright orange peppered generously throughout the cake, bringing their slightly earthy sweetness and subtle crunch. Pineapple adds a welcome bright fruitiness that really pops with the intense tang of the cream cheese frosting and filling — the acidity of those elements make this cake vibrant and cut through its richness. Even so, it's quite decadent, and I had a hard time going back after a few bites. Those first few bites, though? Fantastic.

Tres leches, a Latin American cake with an intriguing history, can be a very challenging type of cake to get right. Because it requires soaking cake in three different types of milk (condensed milk, evaporated milk, and heavy cream) it runs the risk of becoming soggy, mushy, or even slimy. The sponge has to be resilient enough to withstand the onslaught of dairy without disintegrating, but you don't want it to be too dense or solid, either. A tres leches cake done right should be tender and supple, impossibly moist, lavishly sweet and creamy, and Whole Foods' version of this classic is quite successful.

The structural integrity of the cake itself is remarkable. Even swimming in the milky mixture that had pooled at the bottom of its box, my slice held together perfectly, losing nary a crumb. My fork glided through the whipped cream topping and the sponge effortlessly, and each bite melted like powdery snow on my tongue. This tres leches is a little less sweet than others I've had in the past, and I found myself craving just a hint more richness. For a light, subtle, and elegant take, however, Whole Foods' tres leches definitely hits.

A seasonal summer specialty, the mango yuzu Chantilly cake from Whole Foods packs a powerful flavor punch. Tender, moist vanilla sponge cakes are layered around a zippy, almost intimidatingly acidic yuzu curd and topped with mango purée and Chantilly cream. Similar to whipped cream, Chantilly is typically sweeter and enhanced with vanilla. The tropical vibes that emanate from this cake are intoxicating, like a beach vacation on a plate. It's unique, it's exciting, it's fun, it's flamboyantly fabulous. 

It was a bit of a knock-down drag-out fight between this Chantilly cake and the other, and what it came down to in the end were tiny little issues. This cake is not the most appealing to look at as a slice — with its structural integrity compromised, the curd starts to ooze and the whole thing begins to resemble a melted candle. However, if you're willing to overlook its physical flaws, you'll be transported by its dynamic flavors and textures. To be able to balance all of these elements is quite impressive, and this cake achieves pure harmony.

The berry Chantilly cake is the Whole Foods bakery's superstar. This is the cake that caused a massive outcry when the store changed its recipe. I'm happy to report that it's back to it's former glory, and while it may not be the flashiest cake on this list, its the most beautifully balanced, consistently delicious cake that transcends its apparent simplicity.

The only flaw I could find with this cake was that the layers of vanilla sponge weren't even, with the bottom layer looking like it got smushed. That didn't detract from its taste, only its texture, and certainly wasn't a dealbreaker. The top layer was so fluffy and airy that it more than made up for it. In between, there was a layer of cream jam-packed with big chunks of berries: Strawberries, blackberries, raspberries, and blueberries that were all fresh and juicy. The Chantilly frosting had an ethereal quality to it, almost as if it was floating on top of the cake, and it made the whole thing seem as light as a cloud. I understand why people lost their marbles when this cake was changed. It's as close to perfect as a grocery store cake gets. 

These eight cake varieties were all of the in-house Whole Foods Bakery cake slices available by the slice at my local store. First, I assessed them visually, determining which ones looked the most appealing. Then I tasted them all side by side.

I judged each cake on its flavors and textures, making sure to try each element individually as well as all together — the cake itself, fillings, frostings, and other toppings. Sweetness level and balance of flavor elements were also things I took into account. If the cake was based on a classic style, such as carrot cake or tres leches, I also considered how well it represented that cake archetype. The more likely I was to purchase a full sized version of the slice, the higher up on the ranking I put the cake.