Ketchup is one of the most versatile condiments in existence. It’s sweet, savory, salty, tangy, tomatoey… Some foods, like burgers and fries, just don’t seem complete without it (even though a burger made with dry-aged meat doesn’t need it). But there are some foods that are commonly topped with ketchup that have no right to be. Everyone’s entitled to eat whatever he or she wants, but in our opinion these should never be topped with ketchup.
Cheese, bacon, salt, pepper, herbs… all fine for eggs
. But we’re sorry, there’s no way that congealed scrambled eggs dunked into gloopy ketchup can ever taste good.
If you’re over the age of 12 and you still top your hot dogs
with ketchup, please stop. We’d like to introduce you to something called mustard, which is the only condiment that belongs on any sausage.
A bologna sandwich
with ketchup on white bread isn’t just bad, it’s traumatizing.
There’s no better way to ruin a good piece of meat (besides cooking it well-done
, of course) than by dousing it in ketchup. Are you trying to taste actual meat, or sugary tomato gloop?
Grilled cheese is perfect exactly as it is
. If you absolutely must dunk it into something tomato-based, make it tomato soup