What Does Your Starbucks Order Say About You? (Slideshow)
February 5, 2014
The vanilla latte is the little black dress of Starbucks drinks. You’re loyal to the classics for a reason: they’re good. You like clean tastes without a lot of clutter. Your friends can probably count on an honest answer when they ask "Is this pattern too busy?"
You’ve got a mountain of tasks, and you don’t stop until your inbox is empty, even if it means powering through the last few pages of that big report slightly trembling from the caffeine mainline you’ve inserted directly into your aorta. You probably won’t finish this list because you’ve got things to do, and look! Was that a bunny?
Captain Crunch Frappuccino
If being a grown-up means drinking acrid coffee in an over starched business suit, you’re out. Around twenty, when your friends stopped watching Sponge Bob and started studying for the LSATS, you said, "Later haters," and discovered Adventure Time on Netflix.
Upside Down Caramel Macchiato
A sweet tooth is usually indicative of a sweet nature. You like life, and coffee, to be fun. You’re not above spontaneously singing along to the new Sara Bareilles playing on the speakers if conversation drops off during your coffee date.
Pumpkin Spice Latte
You wait all year for this, and when Starbucks, at long last, puts out that sign reading “Pumpkin Spice Is Back”, you’re the first in line. You probably get teased for your obsession with Pumpkin Spice, Downton Abbey, and Christmas, but why just like something when you can love it?
You could call it café au lait, but where’s the fun in that? A little mysterious and totally sophisticated, you like your coffee classic, but not if you have to say it in a way that’s boring.
This drink tastes as fun as it is to order. You probably have a kick-ass recipe for vegan chicken salad, and even though that is the actual opposite of chicken salad, your friends begrudgingly have to admit it’s pretty good.
Medium Coffee, Black
You’re not a crowd follower, and your refuse to give in to Starbucks’ corporate lingo. You wanted a coffee, not a linguistics lesson. You see no reason to complicate things with a lot of artificial sweeteners and made up sounds. You would never say practicality is your middle name because, um, it’s not.