Giving a Thanksgiving toast is sometimes a daunting task. After all, how are you supposed to fit an entire year’s worth of gratitude into one speech? Don’t misunderstand us — a solid Thanksgiving toast is a necessary component of any celebration, but there's no need for it to be absolutely perfect. You need something that will make them laugh, something that they will remember, and something that will keep the conversation going. You friend, you need something hilarious, like Jon Stewart's line “I celebrated Thanksgiving in an old-fashioned way. I invited everyone in my neighborhood to my house, we had an enormous feast, and then I killed them and took their land.”
Admit it: Conversation at the Thanksgiving dinner table can get very stale. Amid all of the mushy, gushy, lovey-dovey feelings, we need a little comedic relief. A like as classic as Arnold Schwarzenegger's “I love Thanksgiving turkey… it’s the only time in Los Angeles that you see natural breasts” ought to do the trick! The holiday, after all, involves some pretty hilarious (read: ridiculous) amounts of food consumption, family feuding, and embarrassing moments. [slideshow:
In honor of this otherwise reflective day of thanks, we pulled together some hilarious quotes so you can kick off your holiday toasts with a bang. And who better to get them from than some of the great comedic minds of our generation?
These side-splitting quotes perfectly sum up most of our feelings about Turkey Day, and are guaranteed to get a smile out of even grumpy old Uncle Earl.