As the summer starts to wind down, we sincerely hope everyone has had a chance to make it to the beach. Lying in the sand is the ultimate relaxing, warm-weather activity, and a must before fall temperatures arrive.
We also hope that your day at the beach was actually a day at the beach. All too often, these trips can be ruined by obnoxious people doing all sorts of annoying things. This summer, Expedia conducted a poll of 1,000 Americans demographically representative of the US population to determine exactly which types of people are the most annoying for its Flip Flop Report. The percentages represent the number of respondents who claim to be annoyed by these folks. If you’ve ever been to the beach, you’ll easily be able to relate. If you haven’t, here’s what to look out for.
But don’t let these characters deter you from enjoying a day in the sun, as you can always opt for one of the nine best beaches in America for avoiding crowds.
10. The Canoodler — 18 percent
Just because you don’t wear pants or shirts at the beach, it doesn’t mean it’s your bedroom. Yet some couples arrive, set up shop, and spend the entire day cuddling and kissing each other to the annoyance of their neighbors. This may be an overused phrase, but it’s apt in this situation: “Get a room!”
9. The Ogler — 18 percent
This is the guy (let’s be real, we all know it’s a guy) who arrives at the beach and thinks, “These ladies are scantily clad because they want me to stare at them.” For him, the beach isn’t about sun or surf, it’s about making as many people around him uncomfortable. Hey dude, you know where a great place to stare at girls is? Nowhere. Get a life.
8. The Paparazzi — 23 percent
The rationale of the beach paparazzi: “The beach is the perfect place to snap a photo of my view of the water. And the sand. And the sky. And the people around me. And some sandcastles. And that seagull.” Hey, buddy, is your camera waterproof? Let’s find out.
7. The Sand-Flinger — 28 percent
News flash: People put towels down because they don’t want sand all over them. When you kick the sand or obnoxiously shake off your towel, it kind of defeats the purpose. But thanks for adding that extra crunch to our food.
6. The DJ — 28 percent
In 1910, the world was forever changed when Nathaniel Baldwin invented the first pair of headphones.Some people still haven’t got the memo 106 years later. We don’t care how “gucci” or “on fleek” that new track is, nobody other than you wants to hear it.
5. The Boozer — 34 percent
Do you know why most beaches have banned alcohol? Contrary to popular belief, it’s not to curb the amount of fun being had. It’s to keep a certain type of person from ruining everyone’s day by stumbling onto towels and vomiting on sandcastles. Corona commercials may encourage people to crack one open at the beach, but you know what those ads also encourage? Silence.
4. The Encroacher — 35 percent
We understand you think the sand under our towels is somehow superior to the sand elsewhere on the beach, but slowly overtaking our territory like a real-life game of Risk is not the answer. Not just because we don’t want your ratty blanket near us, but because we don’t want you near us.
3. The Loud Mouth — 37 percent
Just because you’re outdoors, it doesn’t mean you have to use your full outdoor voice at all times. Please go bury yourself in the sand, starting with your head.
2. The Inattentive Parent — 44 percent
The inattentive parent is disliked by a whopping 44 percent of respondents because they basically allow their children to be sand-flingers, encroachers, and loud mouths. We get that kids need to be kids, but that doesn’t mean they need to act like the children of Satan.
1. The Slob — 48 percent
The people have spoken, and they clearly care about the Earth. Your inability to find a trash can is not an excuse to leave it sprawled all over the sand. (And don’t try to just bury it either… I see you!) Pick up your empty bottles, pick up your food wrappers, and put them in the appropriate receptacle. If there’s room, see if you can fit yourself in there, too.