It’s that time of the year again, and no, we don’t mean the frantic mad rush to get the perfect gift for everyone on your list. It’s the time of year to wax nostalgic about stop-motion animation Christmas specials, better known as the Rankin/Bass Studios power list of animated Christmas movies: Santa Claus is Coming to Town, The Year Without a Santa Claus, Rudolph’s Shiny New Year, and, of course, the granddaddy of them all: Rudolph the Red-Nosed Reindeer. Every year they get a little bit more outdated, and every year it takes a little bit longer to get those tacky (yet catchy) songs out of your head.
Luckily for you, we’ve found a way to make Claymation Christmas a little more tolerable: alcohol. So dust off that VCR, grab your favorite Snuggie (and a few friends), and come play the unofficial….
Claymation Christmas Movie Drinking Game!
-Pass a bottle around every time the narrator is speaking. Every single one of these movies has a persistently-chipper narrator.
-Every time someone doubts Santa’s existence, take a shot of peppermint schnapps (this happens quite a bit. You’d think the adults would have caught on by now).
-When a main character bursts into a drippy, monologue-like song, sip your drink slowly throughout the tune. Bonus points if said-monologue song happens during a dream sequence.
-Drink whenever someone inexplicably knows all the words to “Heat Miser/Snow Miser.” Even the verses.
-Take a drink when you hear “ho ho ho.” It doesn’t even have to be Santa.
-Every time Burgermeister Meisterburger says his own name, you have to forfeit your drink to the person sitting to the right of you.
-Take a shot anytime someone is made fun of for a physical deformity. We’re looking at you, Rudolph, Baby New Year, and all the Misfit Toys. Come on, Rankin/Bass, is this really the message we want to send our kids?
-Take a long swig when something genuinely terrifying happens that would have scared the bejeebus out of you when you were a kid. Like the abominable snowman? Terrifying. And, really, just Santa in general is pretty sketchy.
-Truly, you can simply just drink any time you get sort of creeped out by the bulbous-headed, constantly-blinking Claymation people. You’ll be down for a long winter’s nap in no time.