10 Funny Thanksgiving Quotes
Funny Thanksgiving quotes are necessary for adding a bit of humor to one of our favorite holidays. This day is food-filled, with plenty of boisterous conversation. There’s a saying that goes, “a day without laughter is a day wasted.” Everyone has his or her own humor for the holidays, whether that means avoiding the dishes, dieting on Thanksgiving, or laughing at a cousin who made himself sick from too much turkey.
Here are 10 funny Thanksgiving quotes that are truly hilarious — they convey the things you’ve always thought, but never said aloud.
"Thanksgiving is an emotional time. People travel thousands of miles to be with people they see only once a year. And then discover once a year is way too often." — Johnny Carson
"Cooking Tip: Wrap turkey leftovers in aluminum foil and throw them out." — Nicole Hollander
"Thanksgiving, man. Not a good day to be my pants." — Kevin James
"If you stand in the meat section at the grocery store long enough, you start to get mad at turkeys. There’s turkey ham, turkey bologna, turkey pastrami. Someone needs to tell the turkey, man, just be yourself." — Mitch Hedberg
"Most turkeys taste better the day after; my mother’s tasted better the day before." — Rita Rudner
"You can tell you ate too much for Thanksgiving when you have to let your bathrobe out." — Jay Leno
“What we're really talking about is a wonderful day set aside on the fourth Thursday of November when no one diets. I mean, why else would they call it Thanksgiving?” — Erma Bombeck
“Old people shouldn't eat health foods. They need all the preservatives they can get.” — Robert Orben
“Thanksgiving is America's national chow-down feast, the one occasion each year when gluttony becomes a patriotic duty.” — Michael Dresser
“It's not the minutes spent at the table that put on weight, it's the seconds.” — Unknown