1. Brownies don’t excite us. We are far more complex than that. Give us a chocolate-covered potato chip any day. Or a brownie with POTATO CHIPS CRUMBLED ON TOP OF IT. Oh God; BRB, heading into the kitchen.
2. Sea salt and chocolate is the best idea that any one has ever had. Like, ever. Sorry Tesla, your contributions come second to this invention for us. But, you know, thanks for the electricity.
3. Things like “onion jam” do not sound disgusting to us. In fact, it makes us salivate. No unique combo intimidates us.
4. To the person that started the bacon-in-everything phase: we love you. Marry us?
5. We fear no cheese too stinky topped with fruit too sweet. We embrace it.