How to Have a Happy 4th of July in 4 steps
If every year the 4th of July rolls around and you're not ready for it, this is a story for you. To have a happy 4th of July, one only needs to follow these four essential steps. Get ready for a good old-fashioned American time.
Step One: Make a righteous American playlist
We mean everything from John Cougar Mellencamp to the Boss himself. The more Chevy pick-up references and lyrics about hard times in small-town Jersey, the better.
Step Two: Make (and eat) American food
We're talking, burgers, hot dogs, and apple pie for days, son! You cannot have a happy 4th of July without these essential foods!
Step Three: Drink Like an American
Enjoy ice cold Buds or cans of Pabst for the finest (OK, OK, stereotypically American) beer experience you could hope for.
Step Four: Put a Flag on It
Tablecloth? Make it an American flag. T-shirt? Flag it. Cake? Flag it. Basically, if it can be turned red, white, and blue, do it.