If you’re playing host to an occasion where your party plans depend on a firm headcount, like a wedding, baby shower or bridal shower, having guests RSVP on time is incredibly important. But in the modern era, some people have forgotten the old-fashioned etiquette rule that dictates one should RSVP within a day or two. And sometimes, people forget to RSVP altogether. So, what should you do when people don’t respond to your invite?
According to Emily Post, the answer is a simple one. If a guest has not RSVP’d by the deadline, it’s the host’s duty to pick up the phone, call the guest and ask whether or not they will be attending.
This is a conversation that can feel a little awkward, especially if it feels like the guest is just twiddling their thumbs or waiting for a better invite to come into their mailbox. Chances are, however, the guest simply forgot or didn’t realize that an RSVP was necessary. For instance, an online invitation can feel incredibly informal. But not responding to an e-vite like it’s a real invitation is one of the rudest things you can do online.
If the event you’re planning is a major one, like a wedding, there are a few things you can do to make sure your RSVPs are in on time. First of all, set the “RSVP by” date on your invitations for a week or so before your caterer and venue need the final numbers to give yourself some wiggle room. Then, enlist the help of your maid of honor or best man if there are numerous RSVPs that haven’t come in yet. While your wedding day is the biggest day of your life, it’s not everybody’s top priority, and that’s just one of the wedding planning stresses you can’t control.