No, It's Not Weird To Go To A Restaurant Alone
For a number of us, the phrase "a table for one, please" is something we're too embarrassed (or too obstinate) to utter. It's true that some, or many, consider dining alone to be intimidating, especially if the restaurant is crowded with company. You're seated next to a couple doting on each other to your left; to your right is a group of friends and families mingling and laughing over small talk. Your biggest fear of being perceived and judged as who you are begins to set in.
Solo dining may seem daunting, but in reality, it isn't all that scary. Picture this: a table in the corner just for you, and only you. You can order whatever messy plate and/or sugary drink you really want without a care. Indeed, solo dining is increasingly becoming popular, and with those perks, it's not hard to imagine why.
It hasn't always been unpopular, either. According to restaurant historian and author Jan Whitaker, the concept wasn't considered taboo during the 19th century. Most restaurants were communal, but people were able to pay for private dining without any stigma. Indeed, there are some places it's presently popular, like South Korea: There, the phenomenon is called honbap, which is a mix of the words honja ("alone") and bap ("food").
Solo dining is slowly becoming less of a taboo in the U.S., and society may soon fully embrace the concept again. Eating alone doesn't have to be scary or radical. As we normalize dining out solo, we can also recognize its upsides: gifting time to yourself and improving your mental health.
Solo dining can help you find yourself
Do you succumb to peer pressure when it comes to choosing a restaurant or dish? Solo dining can alleviate that uncomfortable feeling, and it can also lead to self-discovery. Being alone has a negative reputation, but it can help strengthen your relationships with others by regulating your emotions, Thuy-vy Nguyen, psychology professor at Durham University told The New York Times. "We have some evidence to show that valuing solitude doesn't really hurt your social life, in fact, it might add to it," Nguyen explained. Thus, regulating your emotions while dining alone can help you connect and engage with other people later on.
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Solo dining is also a way to take control of your own destiny and autonomy. On TikTok, people are making this exact case. The hashtags "solo dining" and "dining alone" each have millions of views. TikTok user Kee Rose, or @lifewithkeerose, explains in a viral video why they try to eat out alone at least once a month. "The only way ... to get to know yourself is to spend time alone and figure out what you actually like and to be curious and be open about whatever that looks like," Rose said. People in the comments overwhelmingly resonated with this message. One user commented, "Solo dates showed me how much I used to rely on spending time with others. Going out alone is so empowering and self-assuring."
Dining alone is good for mental health
Eating out solo may help improve your psychological wellbeing, too. According to Verywell Mind, time spent alone "plays a positive role in mental health" by allowing you to get in touch with yourself and recharge your social battery. Moments of solitude may also nurture creativity, according to Pacific Standard Magazine.
And what better way to bask in alone time than by eating some of your favorite dishes? Make a habit of this, and you could build the self-confidence needed to not worry about the opinions of strangers in general. Because, hey, if you can enjoy your lunch break alone at a crowded, popular restaurant, then you can really do anything.
If you're not sure how to get started, there are some tips for eating at a restaurant alone worth knowing. A table for one may seem weird at first, but by the time you finish your plate, you might find you've already made peace with it.