If you're a guy, you're trying to impress (and it's probably working). If you're a girl drinking a dirty martini, you're a hot mess: the dirtier, the messier, the hotter.
Too self-conscious to actually order a martini.
Obsessed with The Big Lebowski, and probably The Daily Show. Or, you just like to drink dessert.
You're easy going, laid back, and at home at a sports bar. If you're a girl, you know how to hang with the guys.
You have no particular knowledge or affinity towards beer so you just order "Stella" cause it's familiar.
You're drinking quickly on your way to a non-profit fundraiser, followed by a poetry reading in a former industrial warehouse.
You're twee, and possibly like to throw around words like "mixology."
When in doubt, you stick to what you drank in college.
You're definitely a woman. You're possibly a little uptight.
You're often a little uptight, but tonight you're looking to party.
You're hot. Regardless of gender.
Secretly wishing you were hanging out with your buddies.
You're a huge dork, but you hope sort of in a cool way?
You've left the kids with a sitter and you're ready to have fun!
You're an Anglophile.
Mad Men is your favorite show you either want to be, or sleep with, Don Draper.
You've decided to have a good time tonight.
You're in Cabo.
You're either getting laid, or just getting through it.
You have a drinking Problem.