Have you ever grabbed a slice of fresh pizza from your local pizzeria only to remember you completely forgot to lock the door at home and had to run back? Or, have you ever experienced the oh-so-real struggle of trying to juggle both a slice and a beer at a pizza party?Luckily, Stupidiotic has the solution to these very specific quandaries: the portable pizza pouch.
This triangular Ziploc bag is attached to a lanyard and is the perfect size to store your pizza until the moment that you’re ready to bite into that inviting piece of cheesy and saucy goodness. It is meant to be worn around your neck like a college freshman’s dorm key (only more edible and with less ability to open). The good news is that you can now take your pizza wherever you go for just $8.
“Keep and carry a backup slice with this specially designed Pizza Pouch,” the product description reads. “A durable zip-lock sealing neck-strap pie slice device. Always fresh and ready. BONUS: Just wearing this Pizza Pouch will instantly make you more popular and attractive. It’s a bold (and delicious) fashion statement.”
What a time to be alive.