Here Is a Guy's American Kitchen & Bar Mock Menu
Turns out, Guy Fieri failed to buy the URL for the full name of his restaurant, so www.guysamericankitchenandbar.com was up for grabs, until somebody decided to do something with it.
BuzzFeed brought this amazing menu to our attention, a mock of Fieri's real menu. While Guy's American has "Guy-talian Nachos," and "Dragon Chili Cheese Fries," Guy's American Kitchen and Bar (the parody) has the "Hobo Lobo Bordello Slam Jam" appetizer (38 ounces of super-saddened, Cheeze-gutted wolf meat, sprayed with Axe), and "Guy's Big Balls" (4-pound Rice-a-Roni-crusted mozzarella balls, with toppings). This is the best thing to have happened to a URL.
Head on over to www.guysamericankitchenandbar.com for the full experience of the menu, if only to read about deep-fried steak, the "Superbowl Bash Bro'det" (an MP3 player that's actuall a bidet playing Smash Mouth filled with Velveeta), and "Football: The Meal" (broken hamburgers served in a clear plastic bag in a larger black trash bag that's thrown at diners from 40 yards away).
Update: Eater notes that a lot of these jokes seem to be lifted from other parody menus and joke tweets. Doesn't make the menu any less awesome.