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Replacing Your Bun With a Pickle Is the Saddest Thing Ever

Editor
At this point, these low carb alternatives aren’t even making logical sense

Just eat the carbs, already. Please.

We’ve seen tomato buns, eggplant buns, lettuce buns, and even buns made out of a whole avocado. Sprinkled with sesame seeds, an avocado basically the same thing as a fluffy white roll, right? Yeah, not so much.

All of these gluten-less alternatives have taken over the health food scene and banished carbs from too many dinner tables. Now, the low-carb movement has taken things one step further. Instead of white or wheat bread rolls, popular food websites like Delish are suggesting you use a pickle as your bun.

A juicy, slimy, dripping, sodium-laden pickle.

Here at The Daily Meal, we were appalled. “That’s throwing the pickle ratio way out of wack,” one editor said. Another objected, “That doesn’t even make any sense. Where do you hold onto?”

Which, really, is a good point. A pickle precariously laid over a hamburger would make some sloppy finger food.

What else is wrong with this idea?

First of all, that would have to be one giant pickle. Secondly, while it’s true that you’re cutting your carbs or whatever other attribute of bread you don’t like, you’re adding over 1,500 milligrams of sodium to your dinner. That’s over half of your recommended daily intake. Combine that with the overwhelming acidity of vinegar-soaked cucumbers and you’re setting yourself up for a digestion disaster.

Not to mention the taste… Would you even be able to detect the greasy burger patty in each bite, or would the overpowering and distinct pickle flavor drown it out?

This madness hasn’t stopped at hamburgers, either. The sour vegetables are being used to cradle hot dogs in place of a bun and even replace the thick, fluffy bread of hoagie sandwiches.

“Pickle sliders,” “pickle dogs,” and the absolute abomination of “pickle subs” are making us all nervous for the future of our summer cookouts. The time for pretending these low-carb burger creations taste okay is over: We want real bread. We want pillow-y, starchy, real bread straddling our hot dogs and deli meat. We don’t want a slimy pickle.

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