It’s nearly the weekend and you plan on spending Friday and Saturday night looking through the vacation pictures of you and your girlfriend/boyfriend while crying into a bowl of ice cream all the while wondering what went wrong in your relationship. You think the reason you may have been dumped by your significant other is because he was afraid of commitment, you “borrowed” her ATM card one too many times, or he couldn’t appreciate why you quit your job to form a band with your cousin, but I’m here to tell you that you are unequivocally wrong. The real reason that you got dumped wasn’t your desire to visit all the Dairy Queens in the US, it’s because you can’t cook.
If you are the kind of person who likes to watch copious amounts of cooking shows and enjoy reading food blogs, but never actually learned how to cook anything, it‘s not too late to redeem yourself. Pause the latest episode of Top Chef All-Stars and get into the kitchen immediately because you are about to learn about the five things you should know how to cook to keep a man/woman or get a better quality significant other if that‘s what you‘re secretly hoping for.
The first thing you should learn how to make is a simple chicken dish. As long as your once and future love is not a pescitarian, flexitarian, vegetarian, vegan or something else that I’ve yet to hear of, he/she will like chicken so learn how to make at least one dish that includes chicken. I’ve included a recipe for tomato-coconut curry chicken that’s easy to make and delicious as well. Serve it with rice, lentils, couscous, or naan. Later on I will share with you how to make a simple tomato sauce, cook rice, bake a cake, and fry an egg. If you learn how to cook the things I suggest and you still can’t keep or find a man/woman, you might want to consider a mail order bride/groom.
*Editor’s note - I hope you know I’m being facetious with this blog entry, but if you didn‘t know that then this definitely explains why you’re single.