Wikimedia Commons/ Cyclone Bill
Arguably the most important and life-changing food that’s ever been invented (OK, very arguably), bacon is one of the most delicious products on Earth, derived from one of the most delicious animals on Earth.
One of the greatest things about bacon is the fact that it’s not an idle food. It’s constantly being reformulated, improved upon, and incorporated into other, unsuspecting foods. Every week, it seems like there’s another potentially life-altering bacon development, which is great news for those who like bacon, which is a whole lot of people.
Here’s a look at seven developments in the world of bacon that have happened in the first half of 2013.
Bacon Beer: One of the most popular items sold at the San Diego Country Fair, bacon beer is root beer infused with visible floating pools of bacon fat and several bacon swizzle sticks. It’s up to you, dear reader, to invent bacon beer that’s actual beer. There’s still six months left in the year.
Oscar Mayer Bacon Dogs: The newest product from this lunchmeat kingpin adds a little more bacon to your life. It’s a hot dog with bacon inside it. Wrap it up in bacon and it’s a bacon-wrapped bacon dog!
Bacon Bacon Closes: Yes, for a brief, shining moment, there was a restaurant in San Francisco called Bacon Bacon. They were forced to close down, however, because of two unavoidable bacon byproducts: an overpowering smell emanating from the restaurant, and illegal dumping of bacon grease. Oh, well. At least their food truck is still operating (whether it runs on bacon grease or not is still unknown).
105-Year-Old Woman Claims Bacon Is Her Secret: When asked what her secret to a long life is, a 105-year-old woman named Pearl Cantrell replied with the word we were all hoping she’d say: bacon.
Amount of Bacon Needed to Kill You Determined: The good news is, it’s a lot of bacon. In order to commit suicide by bacon, you’d need to eat about a pound and a half of the uncooked pork product per day, according to BMC Medicine.
Bacon Soap Invented: Have you ever wanted to wash your hands with foamy, bacon-scented soap? Now you can, thanks to a company called ManHands. For when you’re not feeling like bacon, there’s also soap that smells like buttered popcorn, red wine, margarita, beer, and brewed coffee. For those days when Irish Spring just won’t cut it.
The United States of Bacon: An entire TV show, dedicated to seeking out the best use of bacon all across this great, pork-tastic country. Thank you, Destination America Network, whatever you are.