Exclusive Interview with The Bar Genius

Staff Writer
With a recipe for the "World's Best Cocktail"

Photo Sasabune Omakase Modified: Flickr/erin/CC 4.0

Claud, now known as Zag, lives in a small efficiency apartment above his brothers' restaurant, Chez Pierre (his brother's name is Irving), bought by his parents after his father sold his hedge fund for $40 million.

This is where Claud, now Zag, keeps his $2 million collection of oil and vegetables, as well as his collection of bar napkins — 6,669 different ones, to be exact. (He sells his own witty bar napkins with sayings like 'Last Call' and 'Is That Your Cocktail?', six for $40.) He also has 3,200 books on everything. 

Claud/Zag said in an English-French accent, "I have served every President since Eisenhower and every head of state in the world, three popes, 72 Academy Award winners, and 12 queens including Elton John." He has also been a consultant to 320 liquor and spirits companies. 

The co-creator of the Mojito and the Cosmopolitan, he has traveled the world six times serving and promoting his creations. For the last 11 years, he has been a judge at the Best Ultimate San Francisco-New York Mighty Contest Challenge. He is only 40 years old.

The many names Claud/Zag has gone by are: Bar Emperor, Master Mojo Up-To-Date Mixman, and Bar Genius Guru.

He has spoken and taught at Drinks of the Decade, "Hey I Know What I'm Doing & You Don't" seminars, Bar Brilliance (a $3,000 three-day course in Camden, NJ.), and has written for every major magazine and newspaper in the free world. He is the featured writer for 200 trade publications, including LeaveMyDrinkAloneIAmGoingToTheBathroom.com. Not to mention, he has written the bestseller of all drink books, It's All About Me, I Am the Greatest (Limited Edition of 15).

In my brief and scary conversation with Zag, who just changed his name to Cocktail, he began, "Any person can make a cocktail, but can they make up a great recipe using a lot of Velvet Falernum? I don't think so. Only I can, and "I" is my favorite word."

Zag/Cocktail was then joined by his four public relations firms, and I had to leave. It was much too crowded in his small apartment with his $2 million worth of oil and vegetables, 6,669 bar napkins, and 3,200 books on everything. But I did get two of his favorite recipes he created for the world.

 

World's Best Cocktail

  • 3 parts Velvet Falernum
  • 3 cl Ripoff vodka
  • 3 oz Rad's Galliana
  • 3 spoons Blue Afghan sugar substitute
  • 3 leaves of a Calabrand bush
  • 3 turtle doves (no animals will be harmed, use only the shells)

Muddle with a BarGenius muddler (available online from LeaveMyDrinkAloneIAmGoingToTheBathroom.com) for six minutes and then blend all ingredients.

Serve in a very tall glass. Garnish with a watermelon wedge.

 

I Can't Believe I Drank the Whole Thing After My Bicycle Broke Cocktail

  • 18 parts oil of Chevron
  • 3 cl Whoever-Pays-Me-Product-of-the-Moment
  • 5 green peppers, chopped
  • 2 small onions, mashed
  • 2 ounces pure water from Iowa
  • 8 slices of bologna, for garnish

Shake 18 times. Serve in eight shot glasses with a bologna slice. 

 

APRIL FOOLS! Or is it... ?