Fast-Food Mashups We Wish Existed
Earlier this week, the popular literary humor site McSweeney's Internet Tendency published a (mostly) fictional list of new food mashups sweeping the nation, à la "Olive Garden's Unlimited Salad and Breadsticks and Whoppers" and "Chick-fil-A's Magnificent Spicy Jamba Chicken Sandwich and Mango Smoothie." The real joke, of course, is that the list kicked off with a real-life creation that debuted at Taco Bells nationwide last month, the Doritos Locos tacos.
For creative-minded fast-food aficionados, this list may conjure up thoughts about cross-chain mashups that should actually exist. After all, who's to say that you can't have it your way? (Surely not Burger King.) In that spirit, here are 10 hybrid creations we would be most excited to try.
McDonald's McRib with Subway's Italian Herbs and Cheese Bread: All of the elements of The Golden Arch's cult classic sandwich, except that the cloyingly sweet factor of the barbecue sauce would be balanced out by Subway's savory bread. (Photo from Flickr/BuBBy;McDonald's)
Dunkin' Donut's Croissant Breakfast Sandwich with Five Guys' Egg and Cheese: After a long night out, or a lengthy road trip, few things satisfy like a croissant sandwich from Dunkin' Donut's... in theory. Sub out the microwaved egg product and plastic cheese for Five Guys' cooked-to-order components and you have a breakfast sandwich for the ages.
KFC's Boneless Buffalo Wings with IHOP's Silver Dollar Pancakes: A twist on the classic chicken and waffles. The size ratios between the wings and pancakes are ideal, and since the chicken is already tossed in hot sauce (a traditional chicken and waffles pairing) there's no need to take the extra step.
Dairy Queen's Blizzard with Starbucks' Espresso Brownie: Yes, DQ does in fact already make a brownie Blizzard, but not with a brownie as fudgy and rich as Starbucks' signature espresso chip-filled treat. Add in a touch of Dairy Queen's hot fudge sauce and the Blizzard reaches a whole new level. (Photo from Flickr/Like the Grand Canyon; Jane Bruce)
Taco Bell's Crunchwrap Supreme with Wendy's Chili: Say what you will about Taco Bell's ground beef, but it would be tough to argue against a Crunchwrap Supreme filled with Wendy's home-style chili. The Crunchwrap already includes most of the classic chili accoutrements — sour cream, cheese, and beans.
A poutine made in fast-food heaven, starring McDonald's crispy fries and KFC's gravy and Swiss cheese (used in their Double Down gut bomb). Clearly, cheese curds would be preferred, but you have to work with what you're given.
Chick-fil-A Chicken on a Krispy Kreme Original Glazed Doughnut: Overly indulgent? Perhaps. But the combo of Chick-fil-A's crisp, juicy fried chicken and Krispy Kreme's fluffy doughnut and sweet glaze is so outrageous that it might just work. (Photo from PR NEWSWIRE Newscom; Flickr/ Hyoh)
Pizza Hut Cheese Pizza with Buffalo Wild Wings' Boneless Wings and Blue Cheese Dressing: Taking inspiration from the barbecue chicken pizza craze, why not top a Pizza Hut cheese pizza with diced boneless wings and blue cheese dressing? (Photo from PR-NEWSWIRE Newscom; Facebook/ Buffalo Wild Wings)
White Castle Burgers with Subway's Meatball Parm: On their own, White Castle's burgers make ideal sliders in size and shape — now imagine taking out the beef and subbing in the fillings of Subway's standard meatball parm sandwich. That's an elevated slider worth getting behind.
Taco Bell's Spicy Potato Tacos with Sonic's Tater Tots: Soft flour tortillas, spicy sauce, shredded Cheddar cheese, and crispy tater tots straight from the fryer. Does it get any better?