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(Don't) Watch 'Chinese Food,' the Next Terrible Pop Song
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The folks behind Rebecca Black's ridiculous "Friday" released another single today, this time in the form of an offensive, ear-grating, terribly written ode to Chinese food. Sample lyrics: "I love Chinese food/ You know that I do/ I love fried rice / I love noodles / I love chow mein / chow m-m-m-mein."
Of course, that doesn't even begin to describe the ridiculousness of the "story" development in the video. You start off with a man speaking Chinese and making noodles (but like, not in a real way at all), then skip to Alison Gold (the star) walking on a suburban street in the middle of the day, singing about Chinese food cravings after going clubbing.
Then enters a giant panda bear, who turns out to be writer/producer/rapper Patrice Wilson, followed by a slumber party with Wilson and a bunch of young girls (it's creepy), followed by girls dressed up as geishas, and Wilson ruining Gold's house by flying through the roof.
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