Medieval Times Gets New Menu

The kitschy dinner-and-show chain wants to be more "sophisticated"


Medieval Times, the chain of jousting knights and dinner sans-silverware, has decided to revamp its menu to be more "sophisticated." This translates to focaccia bread instead of garlic bread, a whole roasted carrot, and an apple strudel.

If you recall your seventh grade class trip, the other items on the menu include: spare ribs, half a roasted chicken, baked potatoes, and tomato bisque soup. Everything will still be eaten with hands, but management hopes the new menu (plus remodeled interiors and a revamped storyline) will make the chain feel less like a "cheesy casino."

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