The 14 Funniest Fortune Cookie Fortunes Ever Found Slideshow

The 14 Funniest Fortune Cookie Fortunes Ever Found

The next time you eat Chinese and think about skipping the fortune cookie, think again. It could be truly inspirational — or make you laugh harder than you've laughed all day. We're sharing a few of the best comical fortune cookies fortunes that we found across the web that you will definitely get a kick out of.

Fortune 1

About time I got out of that cookie.

Fortune 2

Every exit is an entrance to new experiences.

Fortune 3

Fortune said a palm can say a lot. Especially when it smacks.

Fortune 4

HELP! I am being held prisoner in a Chinese bakery.

Fortune 5

The end is near... And it is all your fault.

Fortune 6

You will die alone and poorly dressed.

Fortune 7

Hearty laughter is a good way to jog internally without having to go outdoors.

Fortune 8

Only listen to the fortune cookie; disregard all other fortune-telling units.

Fortune 9

You are not illiterate.

Fortune 10

That wasn't chicken.

Fortune 11

I found your boyfriend on Craig's List. He wasn't selling his pool table.

Fortune 12

It is easier to resist at the beginning than at the end.

Fortune 13

Don't eat any Chinese food today or you'll be very sick!

Fortune 14

Wouldn't it be ironic... To die in the living room?